Death... But why? Because.

School's Out and I'm wondering what Akua would be doing if she were here. I mean, we would have had the same exams; she would have been happy today too. She was so funny when she was happy. She was like, all jumpy and she laughed that laugh that's making me smile now even thinking about it.

Man she was crazy.

I was thinking, how do people just die like that? It's a weird question. And I've always been one to understand that death is a part of life and I still do, it's just... it's just a question that I'm questioning like a questionnaire.

Why do people die every day as a result of malnourishment? Why do people, who waited for the little green man, die at the hands of a reckless driver? Why did all those Christians get bombed over in Iraq by the Muslim extremists? Why did 400 people in Cambodia die in a sea of panic just the other day? Why did 6BILLION Jewish people die at the hands of Hitler? Why did 1.7 Million Khmer get executed or overworked to the point of death, at the hands of the Khmer Rouge Troops? Why did that guy that acted as the dad on 8 Simple Rules die, on set? Why did my friend die at the hands of incurable cancer?

I dunno.

These questions irritate me. And it irritates me that I don't and probably won't know the answers. This side of Heaven.

Sure, even if I dedicated my entire life to ensuring people stop dying at the hands of merciless corrupt governments, I can never go back to that man in Cambodia thirty years ago, that man that had worked hard all his life to provide for his family, the man on his way to get shot... I can't go back there, pull out Kung Fu moves on the troops and save him, and return him safely to his family. No, I can't.

I cannot back flip into the Concentration Camps, and save the women and children being marched, some knowingly and some not, to their deaths. I, just... can't!

I can't see my friend Akua again. If my life goes to 'normal' reasoning - i'll live another 60 or so years, I'll get married, have children, meet new friends, hopefully see the world, help save it a bit. But in all those years to come, I will never ever see Akua. I just... won't. Like, really.

Knowing all this stuff that I can't do. Like save the child that literally JUST fell dead of AIDS, of MALARIA, as I wrote this, or as you read this...
Knowing I can't really do anything about that, is kind of what motivates me to make sure I do everything that I CAN do while I can still do it.

My purpose is His Purpose. Although I'll never understand, I understand that all I can do, is save the one or two or three or more children that I meet next time I return to Cambodia to do some volunteer services or something like that. I know that I can help that child that is actually living just down the road from me.

So while God does the stuff I can't, I'll do the stuff He's made me to do.

And to be truthful with you, my friend, that still irritates me. I still every now and then get emotional about the fact that people have died and do die at the hands of injustices. But that's just something I'll have to try and live with. Hmm.

Applez For Wisdom.